I wish I could say that I grew up in the age of enlightenment that we are currently experiencing. A time when bullying is not accepted, being called queer or faggot is not tolerated by teachers or students and kids are free to express themselves and their sexuality in their own way and time.
However, that was not the case and in many ways still is not the case, where I grew up. My family, friends and neighbors were a very religious bunch. It was not quite like the original Footloose, because we were allowed to have school dances but in many ways it was more strict. Sex was never discussed and if you were going to find out anything about how it worked you had to depend on your friends in school or the World Book Encyclopedia. Sex was something that was never spoken of and when it was it was reserved for marriage. To even consider sex before marriage was a cardinal sin, so the fact that I had been jacking off for a couple of years and now I had crossed the line and sucked another guys dick AND swallowed his cum was a sure indicator that I was a hell bound sinner.
These are the nonsensical thoughts that run through my head as we are working the farm the next day. Tony didn't move from his original position in the top bunk until my mom woke us up to eat breakfast that morning. We got dressed and went to work on the farm and worked the entire day without talking. He didn't even look me in the eye when we stopped for water breaks and lunch. Was he awake? Did he know what I did? Was he going to tell someone? These are the thoughts that run through my mind all day long. What the hell was I thinking last night? Why do I feel this way? Why can't I just be like everyone else and like girls?
I live in fear all day long but we finish our work without incident. We headed back to the house for dinner, some tv and then bed. He was quiet all evening too, hardly speaking anything at all to anyone at the house. I just wanted to forget what happened and hope that he did too. I went to bed first and lay there for a while waiting for him thinking that maybe there I could say something to him. I would apologize and ask him to keep my secret, beg him if I had to in order to save myself. I must have drifted off to sleep before he came to bed.
I thought my mom was waking me up to go to work the next morning. Why is it so dark? Shouldn't the sun be up? Then I realize it is not my mom but Tony. Tony is standing over me, he is on the edge of my bunk at the head of the bed. His dick is hard and standing at attention in front of my face. That's when I realize that he doesn't have any shorts on. He is standing in front of me naked. He sees that I am awake and says "Do it again man". Well I might have been in a deep sleep but he didn't have to ask me twice. He moved closer to me on the bunk as I touched the head of his dick to my lips. He was already leaking precum and I could taste him. The saltiness of him made my dick immediately hard as the memory of his cum in my mouth the previous night filled my senses.
I didn't feel the need to be so careful and tentative tonight. He was awake and offering me his cock so I could fully enjoy it. He moaned as I took as much of his length as I could manage. (This was only my second attempt at sucking a dick so the idea of deep throating his cock was not even an option). He let me hold the base of his dick with one hand so I could control the motion of him fucking my mouth. I was still tentative in letting him slide the length of it in my mouth so I gripped the base to help him understand that was his stopping point. His moans and sighs were like music to me. He was really enjoying letting me suck his dick and I was thoroughly enjoying the taste of his dick. With my other hand, I had pulled down my briefs and was jacking my own dick to the rhythm of his thrusts. It felt so good to stroke my cock and have a hard dick in my mouth. This gave me a feeling of power that I have always enjoyed but didn't really understand until many years later. The simple act of submission to allow another man to place his dick inside your body and then controlling your own desire and physical responses to ensure his pleasure while maximizing your own pleasure. It is an intoxicating feeling. It is this intoxication that makes me lightheaded while he is fucking my mouth and I miss the telltale signs of his imminent orgasm. When his dick starts throbbing in my mouth and the ropes of cum are shooting against the back of my throat, I snap out of the spell he has over me. Again, I am surprised by my desire to let him cum in my mouth and how much I enjoy it. My fantasies have all revolved around the act of sucking a dick not about taking the load and swallowing. I guess in reality I had not considered that far into my fantasy since I usually came while I was fantasizing about sucking a dick.
When he finished shooting his load in my mouth, he pulled out and stepped away. He reached down to pick up his underwear on the floor and stepped back into them. I am still stroking my own cock and can feel the intense pleasure that he has shared with me start to slowly fade. I focus on my dick and the taste of his sperm in my mouth for the second time in as many days as I shoot my load all over my stomach and chest. He looks down at me and says "thanks man" before he climbs back in the top bunk and slips off to sleep. I wipe up my own cum with tissues kept under the bed for that purpose and fall asleep again, content with another load in my belly and pretty sure that I don't have to worry about my secret getting out any time soon.
to be continued....
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